Breathe In, Breathe Out

Have things been going well recently? Yea, I wish I could say that they have….I’ve been physically sick since Tuesday which has thrown my eating out of whack and I’ve been mentally sick for much longer. Sadly the latter sickness seems to be getting worse. I had to cancel my therapy appointment this week due to being sick and she is out of town next week so that will be 2 weeks without therapy. In the past I would have been elated for such news, but now I’m really questioning it. I seem to have been getting worse since I started going so now do I make another appointment and go back? Or should I stop going? Or is it just that things get worse before they can get better…?

I don’t know. Lots going on. Dance has become a struggle as well and seems to be getting worse. I don’t know where my life is headed and I don’t know who is there for me to talk to which really sucks. Last night I really wanted some advice and I literally had no idea who to talk to so instead emailed my teacher and just hoped I wouldn’t scare her with the abundance of information in a single email. I always regret when I email her about my problems but she seems to understand and at least at that point I know that someone knows what’s going on which is an emotion releaser in and of itself. I am blessed that she is in my life this year and is willing to be there as a support system. I just need to relax and try and not let things get to me so much. Then maybe I will find a higher rate of success. I can only hope.

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